Thank you for joining us for the launch of carrborofood.com, where you will find everything you need to know about food in Carrboro, NC. Regrettably it has taken many years to flesh out our menu and determine which meats to present to you for this lunch. Listed on our site are premium meats that can satisfy any need, whether you are packing a sack lunch or hoarding for unpleasant times. We also carry leaves and fruits like cantelope. While we can obtain some foods using very little force, procuring rare game is difficult, and the degree of difficulty is reflected in the price. An example of our pricing formula:
$Boiled Jackrabbit < $Poachened Zedonk < $Stork Burger < $Fried Ghost
If you have a special request for a meat or leaf not on our menu, please email us directly to discuss pricing and cooking options. Some special requests in the past have included:
•Fried hair (at the fair)
•Honey Sesame Shitters
•Gizzard tagine with ape
To better serve our community we’ve constructed an eatery far out in nature where we serve hot black coffee and your choice of simmering meats only during June, July, and August. Please do not bring any outside food or drink and join us for a 5 mile trek through forest and field immediately following.
We’d like to thank you all again for visiting and do not hesitate to browse around our full selection. While daunting at first, we at Carrboro Food feel you’ll find your favorite soon enough, and once you sink in those teeth, well, you may as well have all your children at once because the vultures already know.
You are at the new I’m Leaving You website, thanks for being, here.